If there’s one thing that brings you closer together as a couple, it’s probably bodily functions. But when can you fart in front of your partner? Luckily, a poll by Mic has answered that age-old question. They surveyed around 125 people in their 20s and 30s about when they start to fart openly in a relationship.
They found that “just a little more than half of people (51 percent) have farted in front of their partner in six months or less of dating (22.4 percent did it after a few weeks, while 29 percent cut it between two to six months).” But interestingly over a quarter of people waited from between six to 12 months to fart. Think about that: SIX TO 12 MONTHS OF WALKING OVER AND PRETENDING TO ADMIRE THINGS OUT THE WINDOW SO YOU CAN FART. That’s insane.
And, over nine percent waited for the over-a-year mark, while a tiny fraction said never ever ever ever ever would they fart in front of their significant other. Never. Let’s take a moment of silence to think of the bowels of those poor souls.
Interestingly, when talking in terms of events rather than time, the largest portion (one third of respondents) said it was OK to do once you were having regular sleepovers. Which makes sense, because if you’re sleeping over then you’re farting in front of each other a lot— whether you like it or not.
Also, who cares? Here are reasons why farting in front of each other is just not a big deal:
1. You’ve Probably Already Watched Each Other Drunk Eat
Have you ever watched someone drunk eat? Shoveling cheese-fries and pizza into your face with like a 30 percent success rate, while saying “This is good. This was such a good plan. This is so good.” over and over. You probably got drunk and did those on one of your early dates. You probably had pizza-flavored sex after doing this. Farting is nothing in comparison.
2. You Swap Bodily Fluids All The Time Anyway
Seriously. Being in a relationship means dealing with saliva, sweat, fluids — all the time. You’re pretty used to each other’s bodies. You probably are admitting to each other when you have a “funny tummy” or when you’re straight up constipated. You’ve covered most of the bases, farting in front of each other is just sliding into home.
3. EVERYBODY Farts
You’re embarrassed about farting in front of them, but they do it too! Everyone farts. Even Emma Watson. Emma Watson farts. It won’t be anything your partner hasn’t seen before, and they’ll be relieved they can let loose. In fact, according to the survey, almost 20 percent of people only fart after they’ve heard their partner fart. So be a leader — fart first.